About a year ago, I made a mistake. I bit down on a piece of hard candy--you know, the kind that you're supposed to allow to dissolve in your mouth--Jolly Rancher, starlight mints, that kind of thing? Ever since I was a child, I've never been able to eat hard candy without biting it and chewing it up instead of simply sucking on it. I'm not exactly sure why, but let's just say I don't think I'll ever know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop! I guess I'm just too impatient. Well, after 39+ years of biting down on hard candy, I finally cracked a molar about a year ago. Ever since, the crack has gotten larger and larger, and the pain stronger and stronger. Finally, it got to be too much to bear, and I broke down and went to visit my dentist this morning (who, I learned today, was featured on one of the Nashville episodes of "The Simple Life"--now I understand why this crown is costing over a thousand buckeroos--my dentist has become a celebrity!)When I arrived, at 10 a.m., they put me in the dental chair, and told me that I would be able to watch a movie during the procedure. I chose, "Return to Me," which is, as they say, a "chick flick." The dentist came in and gave me four shots in my gum around the molar with one of these,
which was attached to one of these.
This is called a "harpoon-type" syringe..........fitting description, huh? (I believe the needle should be called a knitting needle)! These can be quite intimidating if you are not expecting to see them.
Then, the dentist left and said he'd be back after the injections took effect. Less than three minutes later, I'm feeling like I'm going to pass out. I assumed it was due to the fact that I hadn't eaten this morning (dumb move). The dental assistant told me it was the epinephrine in the anesthestic, which causes some patients' hearts to pound. Epinephrine is commonly known as adrenaline. That's right, the hormone "adrenaline" is one of the ingredients in novacaine. (No wonder some folks totally freak out in the dental chair and opt for nitrous oxide!) As you may be aware, adrenaline is the "fight or flight" hormone, and when it gets into the blood stream, it forces the heart to beat hard and fast. (Since I had just finished off a 20 ounce bottle of Coca Cola, I just knew the combination of caffeine and novacaine was going to be a deadly one for me). Well, the feeling quickly subsided, so I positioned my headphones, and I settled in to watch my theatrical selection. So, here comes the theme song, Dean Martin's romantic and relaxing, "Return to Me":
"Return to me
Oh my dear I am so lonely
Hurry back, hurry back
Oh my love hurry back
I am yours
Return to me
For my heart wants you only
Hurry home, hurry home
Won't you please hurry home
To my heart"
This has almost lulled me to sleep, when the dentist comes back in. "Well, are you starting to feel numb?" I'm thinking, "What'd you say? I can't hear you--you put me in headphones, remember?" So, I remove the headphones, and he takes out a dental scaler (pick):
"I'm going to poke your gum with this-you tell me if you can feel it, okay?" Gotcha. Any feeling-I'll let you know. He pricks it, and I can feel the tiniest little twinge of pain. "I felt it," I announced. "Okay, I'm going to give you a little more and see if we can get you a little bit more numb." So, he gives me another injection with his "harpoon." After a few minutes, I can't feel my throat, and I feel like I can't swallow. "Great," I'm thinking, "what if my nose gets stopped up, and then I can't breathe?" My entire bottom set of teeth is numb, my tongue is numb, and my throat is numb. Okay, now I'm paralyzed." About 10 minutes later, he returns to try again with the dental pick. I still feel his poking and prodding. I explain to him that when I had my wisdom teeth extracted, the dentist had to give me two doses of anesthesia. I'm very resistant to letting go of control of a situation, (which is an area of my life that I am still growing in). So he says he's going to give me some "juice" because that will take care of numbing in about 2 or three minutes. (One more time with the "whale impaler"). Six injections for one tooth, friends!
This finally does the trick, and for 30 minutes as he drills, tiny pieces of enamel and a silver filling I had are flying all over the place-landing in my eye, bouncing off his protective glasses--(I thought I was in a high school woodshop class)! Finally, they got it to the point they wanted, and applied the temporary crown. So, for three weeks, while the lab is making my permanent porcelain crown,
I get to wear a silver crown on my molar similar to this . (I suddenly feel inspired to write a rap tune).
By the way, the injections didn't bother me, and the procedure was virtually pain-free. But when the anesthetic began to wear off, I felt as though someone had sucker-punched me right in the jaw. Believe me, I no longer bite hard candy. I've learned my lesson well. Take it from me--just let your candy melt in your mouth (or only indulge in chocolate--which is my favorite, anyway!)
YUM!
